out of the swamp

It's a lousy thing to be a swamp ass, to feel that the various shits you're taking are leaving behind sturdy and gross remnants that are difficult to wipe such that you walk around the rest of the day unsure if there's fecal particulate on your butt and you're just making it worse. I don't like that at all.

And then sometimes, in the depths of your swamp ass status, something just changes magically, and though the shit your making is not ostensibly different in character, what it leaves behind is negligible, and you're burning pretty clean.

These magic swamp ass to burning clean transitions can't be predicted or expected, but boy, are they nice.

The Good Doctor

I had a great idea for television today.

You could make a show called Doctor Poo about a charming and mysterious figure who roams the galaxy in a charming and mysterious vehicle called the turdis (which looks like a small bathroom but is actually quite large on the inside) and analyzes various beings' stool.

The dalek-like things in this show, instead of "exterminate" would say "eliminate" and would provide enemas for whoever wanted one.

And thus, I have exhausted my knowledge of Doctor Who (I don't believe I've seen an episode since the late 80s when it was on PBS).