If, hypothetically, I could have the option to control how my dumps came out, I would not choose to have them all be perfect, resistance-free, fair-smelling affairs. No. I would want them to reflect my moods.
Sometimes, I would want a clean & long one-piece shit. Sometimes I would want a loose & messy one. Sometimes, I'd want it to take a while, other times it would come out comically fast. Sometimes I'd want no smell, other times I'd want something funky to dress things up. A loud dump can be a clarion call some of the time, other times you want stealth.
Dumps: they're the spice of life 🌶
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