To shit the unwipable shit

I took a shit at work today, around 4:45pm.  A lot of wiping.  I didn't feel completely, totally clean in the way you'd like to be (I'm talking about my asshole here), but I was at work, and I was using the toilet that doesn't always flush well (which is a silly thing to say, because if you hold it long enough, it's fine), and I was like I'll be fine.  So I was done.  And it wasn't like, I was walking around thinking there's definitely more particulate shit matter in between my butt cheeks and this is a problem, it was like, oh, there might be a little extra action doing on down there.  So I went to the bathroom to pee at like 7:55pm, and I took an extra wipe or two, and they were faintly brown.  Whatever.  I went to a thing for work, and then when I was there, at like 8:45pm, I peed again, and I wiped again, same deal.  It's 10:06pm, I'll pee again soon, maybe give another wipe, and there'll be some brown residue probably.  I don't care really, but it's just kind of like, what does a guy have to do, what's it gonna take to get you in a nice clean asshole today?