-the frequency of my trips to duduk on the toilet seat have decreased, and relatedly
-the aggregate volume I deposit inside the toilet bowl has increased.
It's like you only go grocery shopping once a week but you buy a lot, instead of getting just what you need for that day.
If this occurs in the morning (the release of aggregate bolus), then it feels pretty satisfying. It also (the big load-drop) makes the smaller, more routine but equally meaningful deposits seem less significant, which is an illusion. Llord, give me clarity, or at least some celery (fiber, etc.).
Hi Doo Doo Bloggin', thanks for taking my call. Long time reader, first time commenter. A quick ethical question. I've recently been experimenting with Metamucil as a bolus regulizer. If depositing is a non-competitive sporting activity akin to recreational skiing or rock climbing, should I consider myself to be taking PEDs, or is this more like stretching?
ReplyDeleteRJ -
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment, a very important you raise.
We all strive for purity in our stool - it is an expression of these immense forces inside of us, and distortions of our stool are at heart distortions of our souls. Some of us choose to seek this purity in routine, achieving a greater meta-stool by the accumulation of many similar micro-stools. Orthoprax observance rather orthodox, in a sense. Meta-mucil is often used in such mystico-fecal rituals.
There's no true religion, Mr. Justice. Your bolus regulation is the way you have chosen to seek enlightenment, and we must respect that. Anyone who would call you out as a doper is unnecessarily issuing fatwas. Their dogma has no sway in your parish, nor should it. I wish you perfectly smooth, even little crap balls, like the circle on the background of this page.
Yours in doodie,
DDB